The bedtime story of the Virgin Mary giving birth to the baby Jesus (from a children’s Bible) gave rise to this exchange last night with our kids:
Josie (kindergarten): What does it feel like to have a baby?
Dad (who knows these things): It feels all exciting and crazy and fun.
Josie: Noooo. I mean in your body!
Dad: It feels like a baby inside is pushing and shoving and saying, “Let me out of here!”
Josie: Does it tickle? Does the baby come out your mouth?
Dad: Nope. It comes out closer to your belly button [okay, I wimped out].
Mom [interrupting… hmmmmm]: Honey, it comes out from a special hole by your pee pee.
Josie: My pee pee! Whoah! [she giggles]
J.D. (four years old): Can little boys have babies?
Dad: Nope, but you help.
J.D. (tearing up… about to cry): Little boys can’t have babies come out their pee-peeeeeeeeeez. Wahhhhhhh! I want to have a little boy come out my pee-pee.
Dad: Trust me, Son, you don…… [interrupted][again]
Mom: [wisely] What do you want to name your baby, J.D.?
Dad: [very wisely] I want to name a baby Pickle!
J.D.: [smiling now] I want to name my baby Spot!
Josie: But how does the baby get there?
Dad: Okay, time for bed, kids.
The human brain has 100 billion neurons and 100 trillion synapses.
It requires every one of them to keep up with my kids.