Maximum Efficiency–One Shining Moment

My fingers flew as if possessed. My mind raced ahead of the action. I knew–don’t ask me how–what was coming next. I was in the zone. It was like magic. Even the clerk knew it. He stood in awe of me. Almost done… soon… a couple more moves…

Oh no! I blew it! I can’t believe I blew it! I was so close! lowes1.jpg

On Wednesday I took a much overdue day off. I’ve been convicted lately about Sabbath and margin in my life.

So what did I do? With my dear wife, we tackled four household projects that had been put on hold due to lack of time.

So much for Sabbath.

I love efficiency. I love smooth running systems, organizations. When I was about 9 years old, my Auntie Jean told me about “efficiency experts.” Her speech was triggered by my pokiness at washing the dinner dishes (in days when dishwashers were humanoid). I’m not uptight about it. I just really, really, really appreciate efficiency when I see it.


The idea of maximum efficiency intrigues me.

Which explains why I ALWAYS choose a self-checkout line when given the chance. I am waaaaaay more efficient than most checkers.

great-stuff.jpgSo, there I was at Lowe’s, buying window blinds and Great Stuff. I picked the self-checkout stand closest to the clerk, just in case I needed human help. My flying fingers dazzled him. I WAS Efficiency. Personified (should I say Incarnated?).

I waved the bar codes with precision. I even anticipated the “skip bagging” option on my larger items (window blinds). I knew that I could skip some steps if I just inserted my credit card without pressing buttong. The clerk truly watched in amazement.

Then he jinxed me.

Okay, I don’t believe in jinxing, or luck, or anything.

He spoke.

efficiency.jpgHe said, “Wow! You’re perfect!”

Hear that, you critics of mine? “Perfect.” That’s what the man said. I smiled, knowing he was right. I was perfect. It was a shining moment.

Until I committed the fatal mistake.


I don’t know if it’s true, so don’t quote me on it, but I’ve heard that Japanese architects intentionally design a flaw into their buildings. This is because they believe that only the gods are perfect. Like I said, I don’t know if it’s true, but it sure came in handy when we were building our new house, and my wife was stressing about imperfections (she told me I could write that, and wouldn’t sue me).

Perhaps God–the one true perfect God, who is a Trinity, and has a divine/human Son named Jesus who effected our purgation from sin–did it to me, because I momentarily flirted with the designation of “perfect.”

With literally ONE more click on the tablet… the click that you click on the pad where you swipe your card, and write your name… with only ONE final click to click–the one that accepts your signature… I CLICKED THE WRONG BUTTON! I didn’t “accept” my own signature; I “cleared” it. Aaaaaarrrrrgghhh. cardswipe.jpg

The clerk cried out, “Oh No! You were so close!”

I lamented, “So close to perfection!” I looked at the clerk. “It was your fault. You shouldn’t have said an…” I bit my tongue. “Yeah, I should have read that last button.”

He smiled. “You’ll get it next time.”


“As for God, His way is perfect; The word of the LORD is proven; He is a shield to all who trust in Him.” Psalms 18:30, NKJV.


One thought on “Maximum Efficiency–One Shining Moment

  1. What??? You’re really NOT perfect???? I don’t know if I can handle that news, Dr. G. After all these years of respecting your words of wisdom and guidance, what ever shall I do now??? I’m undone… (sob…)

Comments are closed.